PAULA DEEN: THE FACE OF............................

As the world is watching Paula Deen apologize for admitting to using the "N" word people are missing the BIGGER picture. My biggest pet peeve is people who apologize for something they intended to do. If you are unaware of the backdrop of the story here goes: Paula Deen & Company are being sued for discrimination on various levels by an ex-employee. In a deposition Deen was asked a series of questions in relation to the charges. She was asked if she had ever used the "N" word and her response was "Yes, of course" (comes off as a little nonchalant). The point in a depositions is to be truthful, just as we expect people to be truthful in life. The other point is the lawsuit is in part about racial discrimination in the workplace. SO if Deen openly admitted to using racial slurs than that may translate to it being ok to be used in her businesses. If the climate she operates in says its ok because she uses it then those under may feel it was also. From a legal standpoint that was a bad point for Deen and a good point for the ex-employee.

NOW fast forward to the deposition being broadcast and the fallout for Deen, it went fast and hard. As a black woman I was not pissed of at Deen's admittance to using the "N" word. Main reason, as a race many of us get our panties and boxers in a bunch when other races uses the "N" word but we don't get mad or feel disrespected when many of us use it as a whole. The weak excuse many of us use is we "own" the word or we are taking the power out of the word, that makes me LAUGH so loud! Power and own, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! We can't even organize to get to a place to own anything and take power over our day-to-day business. Personally to own and take power over the "N" to me shows our low expectations of what we should seek as a race. I don't want to own or have power over a word that has disrespected my ancestors for decades. I'll pass!

BACK to Paula Deen, for years and years and years and years we have known other races to use the "N" word among many other words amongst themselves to describe us. How many "N" words were used when Obama got elected then re-elected? BILLIONS I bet! How many times have we been called the "N" word when we have achieved greatness, when we have committed crimes, when we were the smartest in school, when we are in the workplace or when we stand up for ourselves? Good or bad that word is used on us. How many times has someone as visible and popular as Paula Deen admitted to using the "N" word and not regretful that she told the truth in her deposition? NONE that I can think of.

I'M NOT saying Paula is right for using the word, I'm being realistic. This is not a perfect world. Discrimination happens on many levels in all walks of life. Bringing down the force of Hercules on her doesn't correct anything. It simply makes those who use such terms use them more privately and will lie about their usage of any racial slurs. The force that is being brought to Paula Deen I should feel be brought toward the rappers and other black public figures who use it so freely. I bet if you cut money from black celebrities for usage of racial slurs the climate will change. It won't erase it but it will change. Let's take Lil Wayne for instance, he used Emmit Till in his lyrics which offended many including myself. Many artist felt he used it as a punch line and didn't mean to offend anyone, WHAT?????????? He's drinking too much sizzurp! How would you not think people were offended. Emmitt Till was beat to death for whistling at a white woman (so they say). As a woman I don't want my vagina beat to death! The line was disrespectful to the Till family, Emmit's memory and to women. Lil Wayne didn't receive any fall out until people spoke up and most of those people were not people who brought his albums. That was the only reason he lost his Dew endorsement with Pepsi. What about other rappers or celebrities who use other discriminatory slurs no one is backing out of their endorsement deals, dropping them like hot potatoes. Even athletes aren't penalized for slurs as harsh as Deen is. They apologize, they get fined and we forget.

We are in world of double standards, sad  to say but that's the reality. I feel Deen is being burned alive. I don't know if she's regretful for ever using the term or for putting herself out there. I haven"t watched her apologies in a whole. I saw one that she said "I is what I is and I'm not going to change", I didn't catch what that was in reference to. She has since hired Judy Smith (whom is the inspiration behind the hit show Scandal), now I'm not sure if that is a tactic being Judy is black or not but she clearly is great at what she does. I have never seen an episode of Scandal but I've read a few things on Judy Smith. If you want to beat the biggest war in your life you want the best. I'm sure Paula has enough money left to pay her. There is a special character about people who "defend" those who are clearly wrong. Not for me to judge I just know I can't defend what's wrong. Paula would lose all her money if I represented here, LOL.

I do have empathy for Deen considering how she's "losing" right now when that same wrath is not put forth to our own when the same situation happens. My opinion is just one amongst a millions. We will see how this all pans out. My opinion is largely based on seeing blacks be super upset with others using the "N" word but never being mad at their own for using it! Main reason we are so far behind as a race than further ahead like we should be. I don't use the word, I don't like to talk to people when they use the word. The saga continues..................................

JUST A SOULFUL THOUGHT

Often times to let things go that you've been holding on to takes that one person to listen to you "air it out", it helps the process of healing. That secret you've been holding on to, that guilt, that fear, that sadness, that bitterness, that hate, that anger, that disgust or that destruction. The longer you hold it it eats at you BUT the moment someone takes the time to truly listen whether or not they have a solution/ answers you find freedom in finally getting those words out of your system. That freedom brings in all the things you never thought you could have: happiness, joy, love, courage, peace, energy, certaInty, etc...

Its a priceless gift the one who listens has no idea to the magnitude they are helping you!

*Inspired by the one who listens to me*

YOU HATE ME written 1-27-13

You hate me, I still want the best for you.
You don't like me, I still want you to experience the peace I feel.
You talk bad about me, I still love you.
You can't stand me, I still pray for you.
You think I'm weak, I'd rather share my wisdom with you then use it to destroy you.
You tell lies about me, I live a truth I don't need to speak on because I embody it everyday.
You want bad things to happen to me, If you had that much power it still wouldn't be enough.
You do all and anything you can to make me suffer, yet I smile daily.
You try to set traps for me, I relish in my freedom and I'm thankful.
You think you have won, temporary happiness.
You don't expect me to fight back, foolish on your part.
You've made me a target, never seeing you'll miss me every time.
You've put me on the top of your enemy list, not realizing the enemy is using you.

I am protected, you don't see that because hate has you blind.
I am covered, the enemy has your mind.
I am still, while you rage out of control.
I am in complete peace, you're in pieces.
I am filled with joy, you either miss it or don't know what it feels like.
I pray, you make deals with the enemy.
I live, you do the opposite by turning the word around creating more and more of it.
I love, you kill.
I give praise, pride is in your way.
I give thanks, disrespect is all you know.
I seek, you don't care to look.
I surrender, you still think you know it all.
I read His Word, you laugh at it.
I witness, you don't believe.

I rest in God while you the enemy deceives.

SOUL~MYSOULONPAPER™
LMJ©2013